Elderly Care is a Family Affair

Elderly Care is a Family Affair

Your elderly or disabled loved ones are at crucial points in their life, filled with many changes and new circumstances. During this time your loved one needs support and help in planning their future and making sure all of their needs are properly addressed. No one should walk this road alone, and so the care of your loved one needs to become a family issue. Often family members are the caregivers to their elderly or disabled loved one, so they too may be experiencing many life changes. The best way to care for your family is to make sure that you are coming together as a family, making compromises when necessary, and making decisions based on the needs of the entire family. 

"Seniors are at a vulnerable stage of life. They often face multiple health concerns and loss of physical and cognitive function. More than ever, seniors need the support and love of family members. Seniors often have difficulty expressing their needs, desires and preferences, so they must have someone to advocate for them. And who is more qualified for that than the people who know them better than anyone else in the world?"

To be able to be the advocate for your loved one during this often difficult time, is such a rewarding opportunity. If you and your loved one are able to work together and communicate effectively, this will increase the positive outcomes in both of your lives. 

It is not uncommon for family members to be the sole or primary caregiver for an elderly or disabled family member. "A new study of caregivers says that one out of three adults in the U.S. currently serves as a caregiver." Caregiving is no easy task, and takes up much of the caregivers time and energy. If you are in this position it may be necessary to consider some in-home healthcare options for your family. In addition to this, it is important to ask the right questions when you are considering a plan for your elderly or disabled loved one's care. 

Here are some questions that may be helpful to consider:

• What is the best way to talk to my parents or loved one about their healthcare needs?
• How will the care they need be funded?
• What is the safest, most comfortable, most appropriate care option for my loved one?
• Is there a family member nearby who can be of assistance at a moment's notice?
• What types of services or help does my loved one need-- for instance, bathing, eating, transportation, medications, etc.?
• How do my loved one's religious affiliation and personal preferences influence the care decisions we need to make?
• What types of senior care are available? How do they differ? How does each one address my parents specific needs?

Here is a resource that gives more statistical, and practical information on this subject:

Caring for Elderly and Disabled is a Family Affair

An Overview of Grief Counseling

Grief Counseling

An Overview

Both taking care of a loved one in your own home and losing a loved one, causes your circumstances to change dramatically. These changes may cause intense grief, varying from individual to individual. Every person deals with the storms of life in a unique way, which means that each person may need to be counseled in a way that specifically addresses their needs. Grief can be experienced when dealing with the death of a loved one, but it may also come with other losses such as the loss of independence, dreams, relationships, ideals, and goals. Such losses may cause a person to go into a time of grief, which may result in feelings of depression, confusion, loneliness, sadness, anxiety, anger, and isolation. These feelings, if not dealt with, can cause very negative consequences in a persons life. 

One way of dealing with grief is to go through the process with someone else in what is known as grief counseling. Grieving is a normal part of life as we go through various obstacles, but there are healthy and unhealthy ways to deal with grief. Grief counseling can help an individual deal with their loss in a healthy and effective way.

"The purpose of grief counseling is to help individuals work through the feelings, thoughts, and memories associated with loss." (minddisorders.com) 

Some more specific tasks of grief counseling include:

• Having the individual recognize the stages of the grieving process in their own life.
• Help cope with the pain associated with the loss they are experiencing. 
• Help the individual feel supported after the loss.
• Develop some strategies for seeking other support and self-care. 
• Allow them to express their emotional feelings regarding the loss, in a safe environment. 
• Accept the loss and adjust their lives accordingly. 
• Develop healthy coping techniques. 

If you or your loved one are struggling with grief, there are places to go for help during this time, such places include: professional counselors, psychologists, social workers, pastoral counselors, etc. These people have been prepared and trained to help those who are struggling through the grief process. There is no reason for a person to go through this process alone, or let grief continue to consume every aspect of their life. Help is available and should be sought out when needed. A professional counselor will have the resources and tools necessary to understand, evaluate, and help a person make steps towards wholeness again. 

Comfort of Home Healthcare understands that grief is a natural process, but that doesn't make it any less painful for their clients and their families. Comfort of Home Healthcare will always be available to point you in the right direction if you or your family member is in need of grief counseling. 

Theses resources may be helpful in understanding the grief process:

Grief Counseling

Bereavement and Grief Counseling

Comfort of Home Healthcare is Pleased to Announce a Second Location!

Comfort of Home Healthcare is pleased to announce that its second location is officially up and running!!!! We have started our office in a great central location north of the river in Briarcliff.  

Comfort of Home Healthcare 

1201 NW Briarcliff Pkwy, Ste 210

Kansas City MO 64116

Enter the doors on the left of BMO bank and we are on the second floor. 

While we have your attention for a moment we would also like to introduce our new website. 

 Head on over and check it out!!

www.comfortofhomehealthcare.com

As always, please don't hesitate to give us a call if you have any questions. We are here to help!!!

Family Assessment: What Do Your Parents Really Need?

Family Assessment

What Do Your Parents Really Need?

Often we are so overwhelmed with our own life that we forget to take a moment to consider what our parents are going through and how they are feeling about their changing life circumstances. Your elderly parents or disabled family members are going through things that we can't begin to understand unless we have been in their position. The best way to understand how your loved ones are feeling is to have real, honest conversations with them about their emotions, concerns, desires, and needs. If you truly have the desire to know and provide for your parents emotional, mental, physical, and spiritual needs, then you must assess where they are, where they want to be, and how to get them there. Their health needs to be a priority and the best way to keep them healthy is to stay in constant communication with them, because they know themselves better than anyone. 

Your loved one is going through a variety of changes, as they are losing some of their independence, mobility, control, and possibly certain relationships. It is easy to overlook some of their very basic needs, such as the need to feel important, the need to be touched, the need to have company, the need to still feel in control, and the need for independence. Every person needs their basic human needs to be met in order for their other needs to be efficiently taken care of. 

Here are some practical steps you can take to help assess your parents needs, in addition to considering your own needs:   (ehow.com)

1. Make your own careful assessment of your parents needs. Prioritize specific areas such as health care, social life, and accommodating changes needs as your parents age. 
2. Communicate with your family member to find out what they want most out of life and what they consider to be their most challenging issues. Make sure you communicate with an open heart and without immediate judgement. 
3. You don't have the energy or time to do everything, so decide what areas you can be most effective in and focus on those. 
4. Take into consideration your parent's personality, background, and life experiences.
5. Keep in mind that you don't really know what it feels like to lose your independence because of old age, until you have been there yourself. 
6. When things get tough, bring up happy, funny, or heartwarming memories. Laughter is always the best medicine when going through trials. Good memories or pictures from the past can heal a heart. 
7. Stay well-informed about your options, gather all the information you can about home health agencies, medicare, etc. 
8. When you are feeling impatient, stay kind towards your parents, when you look back at this time you will be happy you stayed gentle and patient towards them during this time. 

This tips will help you during your assessment process, but you may need some help knowing what questions to ask your parents about their life and their current health situation. There are many questions that will be appropriate to consider and ask your parents when you are trying to make some difficult decisions. You need to be able to ask them about various areas of their health, including their physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual health. Here is a helpful resource that gives you lists of questions to start asking in your own family: What Help Does Mom or Dad Really Need?

Your family assessment will be very beneficial for your entire family. When you don't know how to go about your family situation, always remember that selfless, sacrificial love will bring you and your family the most peace and joy!

Here are a couple more resources that may be helpful for you in your journey:

What Your Elderly Parents Really Need From You

How To Help an Elderly Parent

What kind of "Legacy" are you leaving your loved ones?

Here at Comfort of Home Healthcare we see families in times of crisis on a daily basis. We are blessed in being able to provide quality caregivers to help families when they need it the most. 

One thing you can count on its that at some point you are going to need help to stay in the comfort of your home for the remaining your years when your health starts to fade.  

These years can be very stressful on a family, especially when the adult children are left to manage mom and dad’s care. One of the single most important step the process of making this an easier transition, is to plan for your own care.  

I ran across Frank the other day and he had some insightful things to add to this very topic. He put some helpful tips together for us in order to better help our clients and our community.

What kind of  "Legacy" are you going to leave your loved ones?

Legacy being defining as: Something inherited from a predecessor, a heritage. When you apply that to planning for care for yourself. Are you relying upon a predecessor to do that planning? Or are you planning on the government to take care of you? It is rare indeed to see a parent [as a predecessor] to plan for their children's long term care. The reality is, it is up to you! 

Mortality is 100%, yet, few of us want to plan for that unavoidable event.  Part of that is the time of our life when we, or a loved one, are faced with a set back to health and require assistance with activities of daily living. It may be for only 30 minutes. For others it may be 10 plus years.

One important step (one of many) in legacy planning is your “Health Care Directive". Who would you select to speak for you in case of a health crisis? In most areas, law requires you to have a signed Directive before receiving care.

Where do you start? How to select a directive?

Here are some things you’re going to need to think about before assigning someone as your health care directive:

1. Meets the legal requirements in your State.

2. Would be willing to speak on your behalf.

3. Would be willing to act on your wishes and separate his/ her feelings from yours.  

4. Lives close by or could travel to be by your side.

5. Knows and understands you well.

6. Is someone you trust with your life. Can you "pull the plug" on a loved one?

7. Will talk with you now about sensitive issues, and will LISTEN to your wishes.

8. Will be available long into the future. 9. Would be able to handle sensitive family conflicts. 10. Can be a strong advocate in the face of an indifferent doctor or institution.

We hope to share some ideas from time to time to slow you down long enough to ponder making a difference in your legacy.

Meanwhile; more information is available through legacy4you@ymail.com or by calling Frank Sindelar at 816-752-2624.

Thanks for "listening".

I hope you found this helpful, and please if you have questions don’t be bashful.

Here are some articles to read if you would like more information.

Four Goals of Legacy Planning – (articles on the financial aspect of legacy planning)

Advance Health Care Directives and Living Wills

LivingWills and Advance Care Directives for Medical Decisions